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Arakune X Bedman

Description

2 Fighters! NO RESEARCH! 60 Seconds! Melee!!!! Who would win in a fight between Arakune of BLAZBLUE, and Bedman of GUILTY GEAR Xrd? Find out in 60 quick seconds!

Interlude

"Zato-1 and (Arakune) have NOTHING IN COMMON, ARC SYSTEM WORKS! Why don't you use (Bedman)!?"

"You are WIERD with your rivalries ARC. Why not change Zato, to (Bedman) for (Arakune's) sake?"

"First Jin vs Robo-Ky (Odd, regular Ky would do fine...), NOW THIS? (Arakune) should fight (Bedman)!"

"Just because the two are part blackness, is a good reason (Bedman) is a better choice for a rival."

LET'S SHOW ARC SYSTEM WORKS HOW TO MAKE A RIVALRY!

Tick... Tick...

ONE MINUTE MELEE!

WHERE ALL THE FIGHTS ARE SETTLED IN 60 SECONDS!

2 FIGHTERS!

NO RESEARCH!

60 SECONDS!

MELEE!!!

GO!

Beginning

Location: AREA 28 Time: 22:31

(Cues BlazBlue - Thin RED Line (Arakune's Theme))

Bedman was trapped in the year 2200, where he is stuck in a webbing of slime, blood, bugs, etc. He knew he was dealing with somebody with too much time with studies...

That's when a woman was sent flying after a finishing blow from something. Something with an Enigma, and is as enblackened as the worst evils of this world...

She was gravely injured, and Bedman investigated.

Bedman: Yeahyeahyeah, I friggen know you fell hard you sonuvabitch! Who the hell are you, and WHERE THE FUCK AM I!?

The woman was confused at the young man in a torture seat. She couldn't keep up with Bedman's verbal speed.

Bedman: And WHY the hell are you so damn hot?! This should not be the case for someone getting her ass handed to whatever beat you up!

The Woman simply replied with direness within.

Woman: My name is Litchi Faye-Ling... You are in danger... This is Cocoon -AREA 28-... I tried to save him... B-b...

Bedman wanted answers...

Bedman: What?! Who are you trying to save Ms. Litchi?!

Litchi died in the hands of Bedman's Reinforced machine. But a black mass came right in front of Bedman, and his machine.

Black Mass: I m Ara k ne. Who re y u, g ant m on st er?

Bedman is a genius, and even he couldn't understand Arakune's code.

Bedman: WHAT ARE YOU SAYING YOU GOOEY BUG PILE!!!

Bedman was so enraged he prepared his reinforced bed for combat. Arakune wondered why he wanted to fight him in the first place.

Arakune: Whywhywhywhywhywhy... Oh WHY do you w sh t k ll me?

Bedman: SHUT THE HELL UP AND DIE.

The Fight

TRIUMPH OR DIE!

ACTION!

59.9-54.8 Bedman slapped Arakune out of the way, but he recovered, and came at the giant metal bed and infected him with a curse that poisoned him not just of health decrease, but bugs are all over, dive-bombing at Bedman.

54.7-32.2 Already, Arakune was on the verge of winning! Bedman was not only poisoned, he was being mauraded by insects! Blocking did no good, and this frustrated Bedman to no end.

Bedman: SHIT. These insectoids are putting me out of my damn psyche!!! This bed was supposed to be designed to deal with things bigger than this crap!

But when all seemed hopeless, Arakune turned invisible, thus the Bugs were about to backfire.

Bedman: Don't even try. I can still SEE you, you damn prick!

Bedman's machine was on the move again. Now no longer overwhelmed by the bugs Arakune makes, Bedman charged at Arakune, and Used Task B, which shredded Arakune by transforming into a top. He then followed it up with Deja vu B. Arakune's invisibility was negated.

32.1-24.6 Arakune then went into his Overdrive mode, and began screwing with Bedman with a variety of tricks. But Bedman still had some of his own left: he used Sinusoidal Helios, which messed with Arakune's ooze like body.

Arakune felt a sensation as the alarm clock blared...

Arakune: OHWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHY!!!

Bedman: Simple, you... ARE... TRASH!!!

24.5-12 Arakune felt fear for the first time in a long time... He wanted to surrender, but Bedman is low on health, so... Might as well push on.

Arakune attempted to use his Astral Heat: N-Infinity. But as the eyeball paused, all Bedman has to do, is block to evade the attack. he did just that.

11.9-0.1

(CAUTION: 3 DIFFERENT ENDINGS DEAD AHEAD!)

As Arakune's Overdrive shut down, and Astral Heat not work, he tried to turn invisible again, hoping this time it would work. Once again, it didn't. Bedman went into "Instant Kill mode", attacked Arakune and used his instant kill move...

(Cues Guilty Gear Xrd OST ~Instant Kill Theme~)

Ending one

Bedman: Show me your past... That oh so tragic past of yours!

Arakune: Kokon e! Please! T ch me!

K.O.!

Bedman: Revenge always leads to disappointment so I can't really say I recommend it.

Ending two

Bedman: The deepest parts of your psyche...

Arakune: Litchi! Wh do y u wish t k ll me?

K.O.!

Bedman: Saying you'll win next time is a courageous sentiment but, you're in MY dream and I don't really see that happening.

Ending three

Bedman: Hah, you've already made the mistake... the mistake that will cost you.

Arakune: AZURE! AZURE! AZURE! AZURE! A-GUUWAAAAAAAAAA!

K.O.!

Bedman: If getting up after a fall and getting up was really all it took to win, then we'd all be winners, wouldn't we?

(Guilty Gear Xrd OST ~Instant Kill Theme~ Ends)

As Bedman was about to leave Cocoon -AREA 28-, he thought of how things would've changed for the good...

Bedman: Sorry, Ms. Litchi. You're just going to have to let the bugs turn your body into a Skeleton... As for you, Arakune: THIS IS YOUR FINAL CHARADE. I HOPE KOKONOE SEES YOU AS A BLOB OF SHIT, AND NOT AN INDIVIDUAL.

The Reinforced Bed then ran over, and destroyed what's left of Arakune; his face...

Results

THIS MELEE'S VICTORY GOES TO... BEDMAN!

Epilogue

(Shows a person watching some ONE MINUTE MELEE fights.)

(Cues (High Quality) Shadow of the Colossus OST 25 - A Despair-filled Farewell)

???: hahahahahaha!!! Oh, that's rich, these creatures fighting to the death, you know (CENSORED!)?!

???: I agree. If anything, (CENSORED!), you are still unable to fight. Some time ago...

???: Yes? What's on your mind, (CENSORED!)

???: You said I was the greatest Wizard of all of (CENSORED!), and I should fight someone beyond my standards to prove it. What do you suppose you have in mind, (CENSORED!)

???: OH... We'll see... hehehehehe...HAHAHAHAHAHAHA... GYAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Who are these two people on the hunt to fight someone more powerful than the spirits? AND WHY IS THERE TOO MANY CENSORS!!!? Stay tuned to find out!

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